Little moments of clarified insanity....

You probably know what I'm talking about. The moment that happens seconds before you crash your car, and all you can think about is whether you are wearing clean underwear.(If you were before, you won't be after...so what does it matter anyway?) Or the moment you take your boy infant's diaper off and you see him screw up his face and aim the pee gun right at your face. And especially the moment directly following a very dirty word you uttered in front of your impressionable mimicking toddler. (And now will spend the next 6 months working to rid from her impressive vocabulary.)

I have a term I like to use to describe these moments: Bursts of Clarified Insanity. For just a moment, the world is clear, and your brain finds the one inane, niggling thing that is completely not relevant to the situation.  It happens to all of us in stages. It can start out with a little phrase like "Did you leave the oven on?" during an intimate moment, or "That wasn't a fart! OMG!" in a car or van full of people.

Yes, during these moments, it's as if time itself slows down and we see ourselves in slow motion and unable to stop the momentum of the situation. If you've ever seen Doctor Who, it doesn't matter, because anything can be undone. Unfortunately, Matt Smith and David Tenant are busy filming the next season and cannot bother to transport you back to the moment via Tardis. (Oh, dear! My geek is hanging out! Better shove that back in the IT closet.)

So what do you do when faced with the inevitable clarity of insanity? You laugh of course. You realize that life is but a series of random events shoved together to make you a stronger and better person. So you laugh, and hope that next time there won't be a next time. You realize that someday the peeing infant's wife will get to hear the story of his freely peeing, and life will go on. You wipe it up, (or spit it out...) laugh, and cuddle the little ball of ornery. You look at your toddler, tell them what you just said was a no-no word, and that mommy and daddy make mistakes. Then you laugh, and tell your toddler a funny story about when you were little.

You brace yourself for the incoming crash, then look at your spouse and say, "well, at least the insurance is good for something." Then you laugh, because tomorrow it will be worse, but then it will get better. You take these moments that somehow stick in your mind as failures, or errors, or even just slip-ups, and you assign them humor value. Why? Because if you focus on the little moments of clarified insanity, you will slowly drive yourself insane.

Soon you will find that the spills on the floor, and the stains on the shirts, and the dents in the fender incite a different response. Laughter. Things happen. (More to me and Das Bear than a lot of people...) and giving a positive and forward thinking response will save you a lot of pain.

Or you could just go kick a door, break your toes, yell at a nurse, gripe at your spouse, growl at your children, and scold the dog...

To Spreading Positivity and Accepting Faults.

Love and Laughter,
-Kat Lady

Mawwwiage...all about TWUE WUV.

I think the Princess Bride got it right. True love is something to have good humor about. It's often humorous and frequently inspires you to do things you wouldn't for anyone else.

After a while, true love becomes marriage. That's when the real fun starts. You get to see your true love mid urination, and find out that the old adage about women not farting is terribly false. True love allows you to see beyond these minor human faults and only see your glowing beautiful spouse seated upon a throne. (Ok, I am lying about this, no one looks regal when they poop.)

Truely, love is but a lens through which two unsuspecting souls find the urge to create yet more unsuspecting souls. At the barest, love is the natural biological function that allows a species to continue and survive. I believe, however, that true love also begets a kind of natural humor.

How can you not find funny the two bickering old geezers on the bench on the corner. You know that when they meander home, they will settle onto their rickety porch swing and hold hands, like any old married couple is likely to do.

I find bickering an essential part of true love. If you didn't love a person, you would not take the time to try to change them. (I am fully aware that changing a man is impossible. Women change daily, sometimes hourly.)  This leads to bickering. Sometimes it's an unconscious way to tell that your spouse knows you exist. Take the toilet seat for example. Das Bear knows if he leaves it up, I will acknowledge this fact to him loudly when I get that unhappy splash of butt in bowl. Me, I like to hide the remote. That way, whenever he needs it, he has to ask me where it is.

It's all about the little battles.  Let's be serious, we fight little control battles daily, and lose, and win. Mostly lose. But really, sometimes we fight just for the makeup sex. (Yes, on purpose. And yes, it is exactly as good as you have heard.)

Love is a funny thing, and marriage is a tricky path, but I would not have it any other way. It's like having a roommate that helps you pay the bills, clean the house, and you get to have sex with them too!  Friendship became true love for us, which became marriage. Sometimes it works in other ways. (Sex buddy becomes best friend becomes live in partner...)

I knew I was in love when he walked in on me pooping and didn't bat an eye and just backed away slowly. I knew he was in love when I threw biscuit dough at his head in a rage  and he proceeded to start a food fight to make me laugh.

So true love is a random thing that blindsides you and then proceeds to drag you through the briars until you learn to love it. Ask my husband's first girlfriend, Robyn. She let me have him because she knew we were going to end up together, and she and I are still great friends. She's now married with two of her own progeny. So yeah, true love can lead you down some pretty unexpected paths.

To the maze of Twue Wuv, and Princess Bride.
Aaaaaaasssssss Yooooouuuuu Wiiiiiiiiissshhh!

Love and Laughter,
-Kat Lady